Ask Her
Wednesday's Question:
I’m 28, feeling completely lost in life. I have a decent job, but it doesn’t fulfill me. I’m single, most of my friends are settling down, and I feel like I’m falling behind. How do I stop comparing myself to others and figure out what I actually want?
Dear Lost but Not Alone,
First, let me remind you: you’re not behind. You're 28, successful and alive! Life isn’t a race; it’s a series of seasons, each unfolding in its own time. There's no such thing as being behind. The pressure to keep up often comes from comparing your behind-the-scenes to everyone else’s highlighted life. That’s not just unfair—it’s unrealistic.
Here’s the reality: fulfillment doesn’t come from ticking off society’s checkboxes. It comes from alignment, living in a way that feels authentic to you. If your job feels hollow, ask yourself: What energizes me? What drains me? It doesn’t mean quitting tomorrow, but consider small shifts. Maybe it’s a side project, a new hobby, or even exploring different career paths without the pressure to commit right away.
As for friendships and relationships, your people will find you when you’re living in alignment with yourself. Growth can be lonely because not everyone’s on the same path, but that doesn’t mean you’re lost. It means you’re exploring.
Try This instead:
- Unfollow or mute accounts on social media that trigger comparison. FOMO ( fear of missing out) is a real thing and if we aren't careful it can consume us to the point of missing important moments in our life.
- Journal without judgment—what would your ideal day look like if no one was watching? Journaling is a powerful recentering tool that can help you on the days you need to vent, celebrate or have silent moments of gratitude.
- Reconnect with curiosity. Not What should I be doing? but What feels good to me right now? Where do my passions lie at this chapter of my life?
You’re not late. You’re right on time for your life.
